Remember back in middle school those students who pretended to have read the book but didn’t and went ahead with their oral reports anyway? Remember how embarrassing it was to hear their five-minute summary of the first chapter as though it was the entire plot line? Yeah. That’s how I feel hearing President Bush talk about the war in Iraq. He didn’t read the book.

Also, in case you forgot, the U.S. is involved in two wars: Iraq and Afghanistan. Some folks consider both battles to fall into The War On Terror banner, despite the fact that Iraq and Afghanistan are separate countries and the wars started at different times (Afganistan: First!). Fun fact: Iraq and Afghanistan do no share any borders; they are separated by possible War On Terror recruit Iran. At least, I think that’s what the Cliffs Notes says.